CAS Reflection 3

CAS Reflection 3

Brendan Anders

May 3, 2016

            This past week I went to the gym for my first time ever. For years now my grandpa has been pushing me to lift weights and to take care of my body. Recently, my dad began supporting the idea of me working out and encouraged me to find somebody who would go to the gym with me. The commitment to working out was an issue for me. It seemed an unnecessary waste of my time at first. I committed to working out with a friend several months ago, but our plans took a turn for the worse. I became sick and he became sick and our doctors told us we weren’t supposed to work out until 6 weeks had passed. After resting and waiting and catching up on schoolwork, this past Wednesday I was finally able to commit to working out. I think that probably the biggest challenge of this experience was just showing up the first time. It was really easy for me to blow it off with excuses like “I don’t have a gym pass” or “I can’t today,” but really these were all just excuses that I used to validate me not dedicating some time to that aspect of my life. I think that I finally chose to go for the first time because I wanted to become better physically. I was a middle school athlete, but I stopped participating in sports in high school. I am in marching band, but the marching season isn’t really long. I started running this past year and that kind of reminded how it felt to be really active. Perhaps it was just the longing for physical activity by my body, or the endorphins that go rushing through your brain when you’re working hard, that helped me choose to go to the gym. Personally I’ve never been all that big about physical activity, believing that becoming smarter was more important. Part of the IB Learner Profile is to be balanced, and so I decided that maybe it was a good time for some more balance in my life. Going to the gym the first time was both daunting and exhilarating. I went expecting the place to be full of huge guys that were all looking down on me for being so skinny and weak. I was surprised to find only two men that seemed extremely muscular, and so many more were just average and everyday people. This really opened my eyes to the fact that a lot of people really are working to make themselves better. One man in the gym worked out for longer than me and my friend did, and he looked to be at least 65 years old. This experience challenged me to revamp my thinking about the gym community. I was subject to many of the stereotypes that are often found with people who work out. I am pleased to say that the experience was not at all as daunting as I had originally feared it would be. After working hard with my friend for about 45 minutes, we finished our exercises. The way I felt afterward was actually extremely surprising. While I knew I would be sore the next day, I felt refreshed and really alive after working out. The experience really opened my eyes to what really can become of something that you underestimated or held inaccurate predispositions about. It also helped me understand why some people develop an addiction to working out; the feeling that comes with it is so great. I felt confident not just about my body, but also who I was as a person. While I know that I don’t have to be the most ripped guy ever in order to feel good about myself and to be a great person, I could see a noticeable shift in the way that I looked at myself. I have worked out five more times in the week since then. While I know the commitment will be challenging with school, I know that I will figure out a way to make it work. Finally, this experience really helped me realize even further that I cannot keep relying on stereotypes to justify why I do or don’t do some task. If I had never taken the risk and looked past what I had heard and experienced it for myself, I never would have had the chance to have this experience, and I am all the better for it.

CAS Reflection 2

CAS Reflection 2

Brendan Anders

April 4, 2016

            The All-State Band experience that I had this year is probably one that I will not soon forget. Oddly enough, I originally considered not even auditioning for All-State. I was really busy, and with marching band season it would be a challenge to prepare the material three weeks before the audition. I had mixed feelings about my ability to prepare for the audition in time, and so I talked to some adults that I not only trusted but also that had an informed opinion. After I talked with adults such as my parents, band director, and private lessons instructor I felt that maybe trying out would be a good idea. I know that if I had decided not to audition I would’ve ended up regretting it, and the outcome of the audition process would certainly be different. Excited that I had been selected, I received the music for the honor band and promptly tucked it into my closet. I figured that I would be able to look at it the three weeks prior to All-State and I would have the music all prepared. Unfortunately, this was not the best choice either. In the three weeks prior to the beginning of All-State, I contracted mononucleosis. I missed two weeks of school and the first week of spring break. Two days prior to our departure to Greeley, where the event is hosted, I made a mad scramble to prepare my music after being sick. Those two days were extremely stressful and I often feared that I would not be prepared in time. I know I wouldn’t have had to face this feeling if I had chosen to practice earlier, and it was a significant challenge prior to All-State. The day finally arrived, and we set off for Greeley in two white SUVs. After talking with the other students attending, I realized that I wasn’t the only student that hadn’t prepared until the final days before we left, but rather everyone except one person hadn’t practiced until several days before the honor band. This really helped ease some of the anxiety that I was feeling because I knew I wasn’t alone in my worry. I suppose that I could take this feeling one step further and notice that perhaps all humans are comforted by the presence of others who share similar feelings. There is something comforting about somebody that is similar in some way or another to us. Humans require social interaction, and to some extent both contrast and similarity amongst others of the same species. This idea is manifested by the harshness of total isolation from anyone else, which often leads to insanity or other mental diseases. Humans seem to require this sort of connection with each other, and this perhaps could explain why I was comforted by the idea that others had felt the same way that I did. Though the rest of the story is rather tedious, one of the most memorable moments that really stayed with me was when I saw the UNC mariachi band perform. I’m not entirely sure why, but I have always loved the mariachi band. Perhaps it’s the costumes they wear, the happiness with which they play their music, or the combination of the trumpet, guitar, and vocals that seems to blend like gold to me. Regardless, the experience as a whole was thoroughly enjoyable, and I learned about the importance of having confidence in my abilities and believing that I have what it takes to be an All-State Band member. Additionally, my untimely sickness showed me that being prepared for both the best and the worst is often in my best interest.

CAS Reflection Number 1

CAS Reflection
Brendan Anders
November 3, 2015
        The marching band experience at state this year was life changing, to say the least. As always, getting up and seeing everybody in their pajamas and leisure clothes preparing for the busses is an interesting sight. I was amongst the few who was not wearing lazy clothes, and was prepared with jeans and a long sleeve shirt hidden underneath my band sweatshirt. As I recall that, I suppose it is a teaching moment about myself; I do not like people to see me in lazy clothes. I suppose I make this choice mainly based on the fact that I don’t like other people to see me when I’m not “prepared to go out in public.” I always have my hair straight and my clothes nice. I could challenge myself by going out in public in sweatpants and a baggy shirt, with messy hair. Another significant event from the experience was our candlelight ceremony. As is tradition, the marching band holds a special, secret ceremony behind closed doors every year the day before state finals. For the sake of secrecy I will refrain from revealing too many details, but only the ones absolutely necessary. As part of the candlelight ceremony, the drum major begins with his candle lit by the band director. The drum major selects another member and lights their candle, and that member lights another member’s candle and so on. The special aspect of this ceremony is that many people share stories about the person whose candle they light, as the person they choose has significance to their life and lighting their candle is a way of showing that they appreciate them. Ironically, my sister chose the person that chose me. Her selection, a senior (whose name will not be in this reflection), began to tell a story about last year. At first it was happy and exciting which is typical for this person’s personality. But then, things took a dark turn. She said that her life began to fall apart, and soon she began to feel unsettled. Eventually, she hated herself more than anything in the world. She wanted everything to end, to be over with; she saw no purpose left in living. But then one day this person came up to her, a “little weirdo who was funny and being nice to me for absolutely no reason at all,” and that person changed everything. She said that that person’s kindness saved her, that through his seemingly random actions she found purpose in her life again. And then she revealed that that person was me. I walked up to her, we looked each other in the eyes, and both began sobbing simultaneously. It was probably the most emotional moment in my whole life. I had never known that I had had this large of an impact on her life. And so we sat there, sobbing in each other’s arms, hugging, in front of the entire marching band. It was at this moment that I realized what everyone meant by “the little things matter.” My seemingly “little” actions had saved a person from committing suicide. And we wept in each other’s arms for minutes. That was when everything changed for me. Throughout both my freshman and sophomore years, many people came up in front of the band and had told us about how we were one big family, but I had never understood that until now. All of a sudden, winning state didn’t matter to me anymore. I would still do my best, but I began to experience the family that everybody was talking about. After our performance, I just started going around to random people in our band, many of which I only barely knew by name, and congratulated them. This is rather odd for me because typically I’m the hardcore “drumline” guy who doesn’t say anything and works really hard for perfection. But in that moment, it felt so good to be part of “the band family.” I now have the motivation within me to share kindness with everyone, and I have changed my perspective within the band from ‘we must win’ to ‘we must become a closer family.’ I’ve changed in the way I’ve acted towards other people, because now I understand that a few simple, kind words can change somebody’s life. And finally, I have altered the way in which I perceive the world. I always knew subconsciously that the things that bring me true joy and happiness were never material, or monetary gains or objects for my affection. Rather, it is investing in people and quality, positive relationships with others that brings me a certain kind of happiness that I know will outlast any material possession I could ever have. I have adopted this attitude that through making friends and enjoying my time with others I will not only have long term joy (instead of short term happiness), but I will also be content with what I have. I’ve changed so drastically for the better already, it’s exciting to see what the future has in store for me.